The Resurrection of Todd Anderson
by Wilburetta
Summary: A month after Neil's death and Mr. Keating's departure, Todd and the others are still reeling with grief in the harsh environment at Welton. Will they pull together or will the spirit of the Dead Poets disappear?
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note_: This story takes place one month after Neil's suicide and Mr. Keating's departure. Everything that happened in the movie has happened for the purposes of this story. Please review if you have a moment.

**The Resurrection of Todd Anderson**

Todd paced around his tiny dorm room, looking everywhere for his tie. "Shit." He muttered. His curse echoed down the hall. Todd was the only one in the dorms this late in the morning. Everyone else had gone to class.

Dr. Hager heard Todd and heaved himself to Todd's room. "What are you doing, Anderson? Why aren't you in class?"

Todd stood up straighter from habit. "I can't find my tie, sir," he answered listlessly.

"Borrow one of Neil's." Hager returned, exasperated. Todd glanced at Neil's side of the room. Most of his things were still there. Neil had never gotten a chance to come back. His father had returned, though, and taken anything of value, including Neil's typewriter and his pictures if friends and family. What were left were his uniforms, his school supplies, and, jammed between his desk and the wall, Neil's diary. Todd blanched at the idea of taking Neil's things; he hadn't touched or moved anything since Neil's death.

"Forget it." Todd muttered, grabbing his book bag and running down the hall.

* * *

"Mr. Anderson, how nice that you could join us." Scoffed the sciences teacher, when Todd showed up, tardy and tie-less.

"Sorry, sir." Todd had given up making up excuses. Punishment came no matter what he said. He might as well not say anything at all.

"Take your seat and see me after class." Todd slid into a desk at the back. Knox was on his right and Pitts was on his left. They both looked tired and bored. Todd wished Charlie was here. Charlie would have passed notes and made fun of the teacher and snuck magazines over his textbook. Nothing got Nuwanda down.

Todd reported to his teacher at the end of class. "Demerits, Mr. Anderson." Todd thought it was weird that the administration believed he still cared about things like demerit points. They meant nothing to him now. He nodded and began to walk out. "Wait," called his teacher. He gave Todd a slip of paper. It read _PLEASE_ _REPORT TO: Mr. Optern…TIME: whenever convenient…_

Todd sighed and crumpled up the piece of paper. He didn't even know who this Optern guy was. Another person to bother him and yell at him.

* * *

Todd eventually found Mr. Optern in an office down the hall from Mr. Nolan's. He knocked on the door and was told to enter. Inside the oak-paneled room a man in his mid-thirties sat at a desk, doing something with a bunch of papers. For all he was young, he dressed like all the other teachers in a suit with a tie and he had a short, professional haircut. The man looked up.

"You wanted to see me?" asked Todd, waving his slip of paper. The man read it.

"Todd Anderson. Yes I did, have a seat." Todd sat down in an uncomfortable chair, noting the comfortable leather of the man's chair. "I'm Mr. Optern, the school guidance counselor."

"Oh." Said Todd. _It's about my grades_, he thought. _Oh, no._

"I've been looking through your file." He shuffled the papers on his desk. Todd saw a photocopy of the paper he had signed condemning Mr. Keating. He looked down, embarrassed. "Your grades seem to be slipping lately." Now Mr. Optern had his most recent report card.

"Yeah. I don't know."

"You went through a hard time recently." _That's what you call it? A _hard time??? Thought Todd, but he just nodded. "I understand you and…" Optern looked at a piece of paper, "Neil Perry were close."  
"He's my roommate. Was. He was my roommate." Todd took a deep breath to steady his voice. He hated the past tense.

"And a Mr. Keating. You liked him?"

"He's gone," answered Todd, annoyed. Couldn't they just leave the Captain alone?

"I know. Look. Todd. I'm not trying to condemn you for anything. I just don't want you to be expelled." _Who cares?_ Todd thought. On the outside, though, he wasn't so confident.

"Uh, yes, sir. Um, I have a class now, a chemistry lab." He stuttered.

Mr. Optern sighed and looked defeated. "Okay. I'll write you a note." He said, trying to sound cheerful. "But why don't you come back in a few days anyway? You can come on Thursday during your extra-curricular period."

"Yes, sir." Todd answered quietly. Mr. Optern handed him a note and Todd left. _At least I don't have to play soccer on Thursday_, he thought.

On his way out, Todd past Dr. Nolan's office. Dr. Nolan was just coming out of it. He glanced at Todd for one brief moment. "Mr. Anderson."

"Dr. Nolan." Todd returned, cold. He stood to the side so Dr. Nolan could pass, and then went to his next class.

* * *

Todd sat in his room that night during study hours. He couldn't leave as punishment for being late to so many classes, skipping breakfast, and turning in papers late. Although being stuck in there just made it worse for Todd. He sat at his desk, holding an expensive pen. He remembered Neil throwing his desk-set with an exact copy of this pen off the bridge outside.

Someone knocked on his door, startling him. "Todd?" It was Knox.

"Hi, Knox. How's it going? How's Chris?"

"Ohhhh, Chris. She's great. I can never find any time to see her, though. I'm afraid to sneak off the grounds now."

"I can't even leave my room." Todd countered, and Knox smiled. He sat down cautiously on Todd's bed and avoided looking at the empty bed next to it.

"I have a present for you." Knoz held out a traditional school tie. Todd laughed and picked it up. Uneven gold letters read _Knoxious Overstreet_ on the back. Every single teacher had demanded why he didn't have his tie, some in front of the entire class.

"What about you?' Todd asked.

"I've got another one. I lost mine last year for two months and the school gave me about a million detentions and then made me buy another one. I finally found my first tie hanging from the rafters of the Dining Hall." Todd stared at him. "Charlie was feeling restless," he explained. Again Todd wished Charlie was still there. "Oh, and Todd? Have you done your trig homework yet?"

"I haven't done my trig homework in a month." Todd answered. Both he and Knox looked down because they knew what had caused the change.

"Well," Knox said, brightening. "You can't leave but Hager never said we can't come here!...Hey, Meeks!" he called down the hall.

"What?" came the faint reply.

"Help us with trig?" called out Knox.

Meeks showed up at the door with his books. "You owe me." He stated.

"Forever and always," agreed Knox. "Start with problem five?" Meeks put down his books and started explaining complicated trigonometric theorems.

Todd watched his two friends. They had changed since the beginning of the year. They had all changed. Knox was more outgoing but sadder. Meeks was testier and defensive. Pitts was quieter; he never seemed to talk anymore. Only Cameron was the same, arrogant and stubborn.

"Todd? Are you going to join in?" asked Knox, looking up. _I do need the help_, Todd thought. He nodded and grabbed his textbook. All three boys lay on the floor, their heads bent over their papers. Meeks explained everything Todd had missed with the patience Todd had thought Meeks had lost. They studied late into the night, with flashlights after lights out. It didn't fix everything, but for the first time in a month Todd was not alone and depressed until three in the morning. He had a friend on each side of him. For now, this was enough.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: I don't own any DPS characters, they are from the great imaginings of Tom Schulman.

Also, please review if you have the chance. (Thanks to all who did!!).

**Chapter 2: Problems for Todd and Knox**

Todd woke up three days later feeling better than he had in a month. He had aced his trig test because Meeks had been coaching him every spare minute. While grades were no longer a priority for Todd, it was always nice to know that you were good at _something_. A "Great Job!" scrawled in bright red ink at the top of his page didn't hurt either.

Because of Knox's tie, his teachers had fewer reasons to punish Todd, and as such he could leave his dorm room during study hours for the first time (without being worried about getting caught.) Todd was thankful for both his friends. They all felt the absence of Neil yet they never talked about it. But Todd wasn't sure he wanted to talk about it. At the same time, he wasn't sure anymore if those nights in the cave had ever existed. Those times were so far behind him.

Todd got dressed and listened to the comforting noises of the other boys getting ready. He had slept through this or tuned it out for so long. He was on-time for breakfast; it was odd not to be scolded for being late first thing in the morning.

* * *

Todd managed to make it through the day without being yelled at for not doing his homework. He had actually done some of it, for one, and he also copied chemistry questions from Knox five minutes before class. It was just as he was changing into his soccer uniform that Todd realized it was Thursday; he had an appointment with Mr. Optern today. He smiled and began changing back into his school uniform. Todd hated soccer.

* * *

Todd walked down Mr. Nolan's intimidating hallway quickly but at least this time he knew where he was going. He knocked on Optern's door and went in. He stood behind his chair until Optern waved at him to sit. Todd waited while Optern talked on the phone and stared at his shoes. He was still wearing soccer cleats.

"Todd, hi!" said Optern when he finally got off the phone.

"Sir," Todd replied, not sure how formal to be.

"How are you?"

"Fine. How are you?" Todd hated small talk. It wasn't like anyone actually _cared_ how he was.

"Not bad. I had an excellent scone this morning." Todd looked up at him, surprised that a scone could have such power in the world. "So, I was thinking we could talk about Neil Perry."

_So, I was thinking that we couldn't_ was what Todd wanted to say. He decided this would probably not work out well for him and said nothing at all.

"Tell me about him," Optern persisted.

Todd remained closemouthed.

"What if I told you that anything you say here will stay here? No one will know but me. Not your parents, your friends, or your teachers."

Todd was sure he was working for Mr. Nolan.

"Did you like Neil?" Optern finally asked.

"Neil was the best…" Todd whispered, though he'd meant to say nothing.

"How so?" followed up Optern quickly.

"He-he was…just…" Todd thought of the day Neil had come in to their room exuberant because of the flier advertising open tryouts for _A Midsummer Night's Dream_. Neil had been happy and excited and…alive. A shiver went down Todd's back. He couldn't do this. No one ever talked about Neil. Even Neil's funeral hadn't really been about Neil. At it Mr. Nolan had talked about a dedicated student and an asset to Welton. Neither of these things was true. Neil had only done well in school to try and please his father; he didn't care about the work itself. His death had also set off a chain of events that had made things worse for Welton.

Mr. Optern watched Todd, his chin leaning on the palm of his hand. Todd looked down again. His gaze fell on the bottom of Optern's enormous teak desk. Todd hated big desks. They made people look important when really they were just stupid. He gritted his teeth and forced himself to recite the multiples of seven in his head.

"Are you alright?" asked Mr. Optern, not unkindly. "It's okay to be sad." Todd nodded jarringly. _21, 28, 35, 42…_ "No one expects you to be perfectly fine."

_Like hell they don't! They expect me to get A's and be on time for everything and do homework in Neil's room! _Todd thought this viciously and hoped none of it appeared on his face.

Optern studied Todd for a second and sighed. "You can go. I'll write you a note for soccer." Todd looked at the clock: 45 minutes of practice still remained. "Come back on Monday?" Todd nodded again and, after receiving the note, ran out the door.

He walked back to his dorm breathing hard. But no one can cry in a all-boy's school without consequence and he leaned against the entrance and forced himself to calm down.

* * *

On his first night of freedom from his room, Todd didn't know where to go. He wasn't sure he could handle the common-room, with everyone in it watching every move he made. Todd stopped by the window on the stairs and looked towards the forest. Somewhere in there lay a river, and, beside it, a cave. The Dead Poet's cave. Neil's cave. No, no. He _definitely_ couldn't go there.

In the end Todd went to the dock and sat down. It was a freezing night, and he shivered in the wind. He wished he smoked. People always looked impossibly cool when they sat alone smoking and impossibly nerdy when they just sat alone.

After awhile Todd felt like an icicle and was on his way back to campus when he saw someone trudging hesitantly in the same direction. As he got closer Todd recognized Chris, Knox's girlfriend. "Chris!" he called out. "Hi! What are you doing here?"

"Todd?" Chris looked relieved to see him. "I came to see Knox. He's been so distant lately."

Todd did not want to discuss any of his friends and just nodded. "L-look. You can't be seen here."

"Yeah, I know," admitted Chris, smiling. Todd remembered when Chris had come to visit Knox right after the funeral. They had been caught in his room. Knox still wasn't allowed to use the phone as punishment.

Todd lead Chris to the storage room; all the boys' suitcases and summer clothes were housed there. It was also the place where Charlie had punched Cameron. Todd told Chris to wait there and went to the common-room. Knox had his books open but he clearly wasn't doing any work. "You have a visitor," Todd told him.

"Who?" asked Knox, surprised.

"She walks in beauty, like the night," replied Todd. It was their secret code for Chris. Now that Todd thought about, it wasn't a very good secret code.

"Where?"

"In the storage room," answered Todd. Knox rushed off, excited. Todd gathered his history notes and followed him. He sat outside the door, keeping guard for his friend, pretending to study for history.

Half an hour later Todd looked up from his books, startled out of his thoughts. Until then, he hadn't heard any noise coming from the storage room, which was a good thing. If they were caught, Knox and Chris would be in huge trouble. But now Todd heard the sound of yelling.

"Knox, I like you! I really do…but I can't do this anymore!"

"What?" challenged Knox.

"Only see you once a month! Sneak around! Come to your school and talk to you in a closet! Everything!" Chris yelled at him.

Todd winced, glad he wasn't Knox.

"I can't help it that I'm here! Chris, I love you!" Knox burst out. Chris started crying, loudly at first but then her tears softened.

"Mr. Anderson!" Todd whipped his head around. Dr. Hager was headed in his direction. "What are you doing there?"  
"Uhm…Uh…waiting…for…you, _Dr. Hager_! I wanted to ask you something…" shouted Todd, hoping that Knox and Chris would hear this and be quiet.

"Well, what is it?" demanded Hager.

"I want to…uhm…j-join the…track team, sir." Todd knew that Dr. Hager was the faculty supervisor for the track team. "Do you know when the next practice is?" asked Todd, still talking louder than normal. Dr. Hager looked at Todd warily.

"Tomorrow morning before school. 6 AM sharp, I'll be expecting you." Dr. Hager started to walk away and turned back to Todd. "Good work, son. I think joining the track team is an excellent idea."

Todd groaned inwardly at the idea of running around at six in the morning, and thought _Knox, you'd better appreciate this!_


End file.
